It's been more than two months since my last post. Not only because I forgot my password, I've been very busy with work. Is work worth it? Not at all. It's okay to suck at work. But it's not okay to suck as a husband.

Last night, me and my wife had our worst fight. I wouldn't go into details as they're too personal. All I want to say is that I'm really sorry. Somehow I've managed to depreciate my sorry to worthless apologies. It's sad things like this had to happen. But it's my fault and there's no one else to blame. Like blaming others is good right? Anyway, I hope we grow out of this experience. Like she said, both parties should grow in the relationship cause if only one is, then that's not healthy.

Now I feel a little better. Writing your feelings seem to work. Still sorry for what I've done but no more self pity. What I have to do is learn from my mistakes and move on. I'll figure things out as I go my way. Hope it's not too late. I have to work now. It's almost 10a and I haven't started yet. I love you Mah Love.

December

December is the happiest month for me as it is the time of Christmas, the day our Lord Jesus Christ was born. But before we get into the holiday spirit, I want to share with you what happened last week. It was my birthday and my wife threw a party for me together with our friends. It was the best birthday party I have ever had so far. Not because I can't remember when I last had a birthday party but because every year just keeps getting better. I guess the main secret to a really happy birthday is what my wife's real intention was, to share our blessings. And boy I shared my greatest blessing to our friends by sharing my wife's home cooked dishes. All are just superb in taste and presentation. Now I'm getting hungry. 30 minutes more before lunch time and I'm already starving. Got to hold on to the Carbonara we had for breakfast which was from my birthday party. It still tasted good. Anyway, there's a lot of stuff going on lately with my wife with regards to her work, friends and family. I just want her to know that when everyone seems to be angry at you, there's always someone you can go to, God. Not me. I also get mad at you. Hehe. But only when there's a valid reason. And I know we wouldn't carry it to sleep. So I'll see you later.

SL=MC

My wife and I have this funny attitude. We apply for sick leave when we're not sick so we can go out, and when we're really sick we go to work. We always apply together because we felt our sick leave was wasted if we're not together. My co-workers find it weird because they don't do that.

Another funny thing about MCs (Medical Certificate), that's their term for sick leaves (e.g. I'm on MC), we always consume it at the start or at the end of the week. I think I can generalize on this but we Filipinos really love long weekends.

I talk about MCs today because my wife is sick and she went to work. My poor wife, she always get sick with all the stress at work. But she doesn't have to worry as I'm sure God will make her well soon and I will always be there to take care of her.

Oops. What am I still doing here in the office? Got to go now to take care of my wife. I shall return.

iPhone Addiction

Although I'm in the IT industry, I was never a techy guy. I'm not into gadgets as I'm supposed to be. But the 3GS iPhone from Apple is changing all that. Not because it is very cool and fast, but because of the role it played between my wife and I.

Getting the 3GS iPhone here in SG the first day it is available is so challenging. We have to reserve online to make sure that we get one. But that's the easy part. The harder part is the collection. We went to collect the phone on the first night it was available but to our surprise, a very long queue was waiting for us. We went to the end of the line only to find out that it will take us 6 hours before we can get the phone. We've decided to go home and come back early the next day and we did. The line seemed shorter now but it's still very long. It took us three hours before my wife is actually holding her new phone.

Now, although I'm having less sleep because of the iPhone, downloading and playing free applications, it's okay as long as I'm doing it with my wife.

Stronger Than Yesterday

The last two days have been very stressful for me. I was stressed with work. I had lunch at 1p. My mommy-in-law scolded me. I accidentally cut my finger. My stomach was aching all day. I unintentionally hurt my wife. The next day, my boss scolded me for two hours. And then he gave me more work which means more stress.

And then my wife started doing things that made me feel better. She started forwarding me inspirational emails that really inspired me at that moment. Phrases like, "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger." Stuff like that. And then she calls my mom. A gesture of showing that she's giving effort to be closer to my family. And finally, we made up. I said my apologies and so did she.

Now I feel a lot better. I feel stronger. More inspired. Our relationship became stronger as well I believe. And I thank God for that. For giving us the opportunity to be stronger. For making our relationship stronger.

Lending Money

My wife is like my dad when it comes to lending money. They would go out of their way to cater to the person in need. They would borrow from a bank or from someone so that they can lend it and bury themselves to debt.

Last year, a friend of ours lost her job due to the recession. She lost her sole source of income and that ate all her savings. It came to a point that she has to borrow money just to survive every day. My wife, being generous as she is lent our friend. It may be a small amount for others but at that point in time, it was all our friend needed.

Today, a couple of months before our garden wedding, my wife and I are experiencing how expensive getting married is. We've been living by the coins that have accumulated from change everyday. Then all of a sudden, the friend of ours sent my wife a message that she's going to pay her back the money she owed her from long ago.

I guess God has planned this all along. Generosity have its rewards. Help when you can so when it's the other way around, God has someone to use to deliver the package.

Fight!

While I want to make this blog all about happy moments, that's not the reality of marriage. My wife and I had a lot of petty fights before, and we are having one again right now.

It started last night when I went home late from playing basketball. I knew something was wrong the moment our lips touched. It's not the usual warm feeling that you get when you kiss your love one. Instead, I felt coldness. I ate dinner alone. Took a shower. And when I'm finally settled, she was already tucked in bed. We were both silent the whole night. So unlikely of our personalities. You will know something is not right. Having a bigger ego than she has which I am not proud of, she started a conversation which I thought would clear things up. Unfortunately, it did not. It went on till this morning before she finally told me what she's upset about. Apparently it was all a misunderstanding. It was never about me being late from basketball. It was about her being emotionally and physically tired and not being there for her just added to that. I was so focused on myself but it's actually not about me. Now that everything is clear, I'm looking forward to making-up with her as I missed her so much. Moral of the story, communication is really important.

Thank you God for continuously making our relationship stronger.